Lots

It's been 10 years since this picture was taken. I have no idea what he was doing and what i am laughing at. But I have a suspicion we were laughing at the amount of times we were asked the same question over and over again...

Where are you two going to live?

Where are you going on your honeymoon?

When are you going to have children?

If only we could have glimpsed the future, we could have given a lot more interesting answers.

For example: Where are you two going to live?
We will be living in what we think is a haunted basement apartment in a crappy part of midvale across the street from children who swim in their garbage can. After a few months we will discover it is not haunted just being broken into by the upstairs tenants who would like us to leave. We will. We will buy a house that is a very ugly shade of pink on the outside with a very bright white kitchen inside that i love but end up loathing due to the impossibility of keeping it clean. But we will be happy there.

and Where are you going on your honeymoon?
Our intended destination will be San Diego but we will stop anywhere we want because we can. we will stop in st.george and in cedar city and in vegas and spend one day in san diego and one in tiawana and head back home stopping again in vegas and going to strange places like the guiness book of world records museum. We will have really ugly caracatures drawn of ourselves and save them thinking we will frame them someday, but we never will. But looking at them will make us happy.

and When are you two going to have children?
we will have a six week old baby in our arms as we celebrate our first year anniversary. We will be overwhelmed and shocked but we will be very happy. (that answer would definately have raised some eyebrows.)

Fast forward 10 years. We celebrated with baby number four in our arms. No night out, no gifts, no fancy cards, just reflection. About lots of water under the bridge. Lots of best laid plans that failed. Lots of unexpected hiccups in the road. Lots of mountains built out of mole hills. Lots of lessons learned. Lots of understanding. Lots of inside jokes. Lots of laughter. Lots of kids. Lots of joy. Lots of life.

May 25 = 10 years = happiness.

Here's to the next 10...

i will survive

Let me just say this. If you ever hear someone say, "After three kids, it doesn't matter how many you have. It's all the same" ... DO NOT BELIEVE THEM.

I fell off the face of the blogging universe for a while so i could deal with a few things.

Things like :

Jaundice, bilirubin counts, and photo therapy lights. (Which as of this morning he is thankfully finished with.)

An infected circumcision for Porter. (lovely)

A urinary tract infection for me. (Thanks to the four catheters I got to enjoy while in the hospital)

Children that want to be just a TAD too helpful. (can we say overwhelming?)

A very sick three year old which is also synonymous with the CRANKIEST three year old ON THE PLANET.

Children that feel that summer should begin early and want to stay up until midnight.

Finding the right kind of pacifier that this little baby will take. (this is vital to my well being.)

Little to no sleep.... which of course was to be expected.

My point? Man, change is always hard, but SERIOUSLY newborn change is the hardest. I think it is made more complex due to crazy hormones that cause me to cry at the drop of the hat, or with each minor hiccup in the day. (any of you that know me, know this is highly irregular behavior)

But people have been so good.

There have been dinners.
There were many thoughtful gifts.
Endless well wishes via facebook.
There have been sister in laws that take my children so I can sleep a few consecutive hours.
The weather that has been so perfect for banishing my loud children to outside play.
A husband who has been BBQ ing every meal so I don't have to cook.
And wonderful summer shows to obsess over (please tell me you watch So You Think You Can Dance).

So I am back. I am just typing a little slower due to the bundle in my arms, but I am here nonetheless.

belated announcement

He's here. He's large and he is in fact, in charge. Porter Maxwell Swanson made his way here at 3:30 pm Thursday May 14, 2009. He beat the family weight record at 9lbs. 10 ounces. (1 tiny ounce bigger than Jonas) and 21 1/2 inches long. His head is also by the way, huge.
Trust me.
He is currently sitting next to me making the cutest most pathetic whimpers the world has ever heard.

His feet are tiny and wrinkled and perfect.

His hands sweet and soft and yummy.
His nose really IS as cute as any button I have ever seen.

His profile? Well just you look for yourself:

And yes, you could in fact, loose yourself in those cheeks.

He's got multiple chins and we love every one of them. His sounds, his movements, his mannerisms are all the talk around this house. He is being thoroughly enjoyed by all his adoring pupils/siblings. There is currently a timer set up to make sure everyone has equal time and rights to the baby adoration.

We are feeling the baby love.

still here

I am still here. In my comfortable house, within walking, er, i mean waddling distance, to my comfortable bed.
But my brain, my heartburn, and my bladder teamed up to keep me away from said bed most of the night anyway.
I am tired and bummed.
It is so weird to say, but I wish I were in a place like this, doing something like this:

trying not to vomit into a pea sized pink bowl.
Lovely picture, I know, and you are very welcome for it.

much to my disappointment, those women who go into labor by themselves blasted me again and I have to wait ONE. DAY. MORE.

A one day delay when you were so close.....
feels a little like :
A good smack in the face.
Camping in the rain.
Totally getting uninvited to a party. Better yet, Prom.
Stopping to smell the roses, only to get stung by a bee.
Racing home to watch American idol just to find out it never recorded.

Do I sound sufficiently bummed?

Because I am.

But I won't be for long, because come tomorrow morning, I will be vomiting in the hospital,
right where I belong.

7 days

I am not a huge fan of pain. Especially when I am the one experience it. And the thought of pain has been weighing heavily on my mind as I am getting closer and closer to the big labor day.
This aversion to severe pain is the reason I am so so grateful for the epidural.

I am a big fan of the epidural.

Bless the man or woman who created it.
Bless the Doctors who administer it.

I have enjoyed the epidural three times already and as much as I love and show my gratitude for it, I am terrified every time I receive one. It's honestly the worse part about giving birth for me. Every time I dread it for days in advance (which is about now) and until the moment the needle is in and working properly. (anyone else as crazy as me?)

I have been having strange labor dreams as of late which almost always include the epidural and on occasion Michelle Obama packing my hospital bag for me. (but that's another story).
It's been on my mind so much that today I sat down to the computer and...

I googled photos of an epidural needle.

I have no idea why I am so stupid. (maybe you could enlighten me). It immediately made me so ill and so nervous. Which means today I am in a constant state of sick to my stomach and I have no idea when that feeling is planning on leaving me.

If I had a husband in town, then I would make him take me to dinner and a movie to distract me.
But I do not and will not for days. So here is your chance to help me.

Distract me with something. Anything. I'm not picky.



And do it fast before I google "epidural horror stories".