about the "octo-mom". Unless you have been living in a cave with a terrorist or you are say, Briana, you know all about the story and you have a strong opinion about it. I do too. I have kept my opinion about this to myself for the most part. But after some prodding I have been convinced to sound off here.
I apologize for the offense that I likely may cause. This is MY opinion (meaning it doesn't need to be yours) and I have been called crazy before so feel free to label me after reading.
OK, so my opinion is, I don't get it. I don't get the big hairy deal. I don't get why we have to beat the woman up in the media about her decision to have children. Firstly, I come from a family of 7. I survived. I thrived. I had everything I really needed (I never did get that pony though). My father was an FBI agent. He was low on the totem pole for years which means he went wherever whenever. My mom took care of the seven of us splendidly. (there was an unfortunate incident with the fish and a bottle of Windex but I have forgiven her for her lack of attentiveness with the younger ones).
This woman chose to have children. Lots of them. Six. She had a job and was raising them with help from her parents. (wanna know a secret? my mom helps me and so does my mother in law. and I only have 3 1/2 kids!) This woman wanted one more baby. She knew her chances of all of the embryos taking was VERY SLIM. (just ask the thousands of woman going that route and being disappointed again and again.) But guess what? They took. All of them. Plus a couple multiplied! So low and behold here she is 14 children later, being blasted by the media and society on a daily basis for what? Choosing motherhood?
I am not stupid (most of the time). I get that it's not the smartest thing to choose parenthood without a spouse there to support you. I am 150% sure I couldn't handle my life without mine. But if my husband were to be gone tomorrow, I would hate to hear people saying that I have no right to my children because I was a single parent. My point is, at what point do we decide who is fit to be a mother and to exactly how many children?
I resent the fact that the media is making her seem like a crazy person because she chooses to have a large family.
I also resent the fact they keep asking how is she going to take care of 8 babies alone? Duh. No one can. And every other parent of multiples has a support system of neighbors, friends, and their church there to help (ever seen Jon and Kate plus 8?). Why is she so different?
I also resent the fact people keep saying how will she afford this? Let me tell you if I or most people I know were to be given 8 babies at once I would in no way be able to support them either. I have seen parents of quads and more talk about how if it weren't for the financial help of friends, strangers and companies they wouldn't have made it either. Why are they so acceptable to society?
I also resent the fact people are up in arms about how the tax payers will be paying for her children. Let me just say I would much rather pay for her children than I would say like a 250,000$ redecorating allowance for the white house (if ikea is good enough for the me, it ought to be good enough for the president, right?) or $400,000 in new vehicles for congressmen, or how about billions of dollars for under performing CEO's of companies that drove our country to the financial predicament we are in?
I guess I am just wondering who in the crap are we to judge who is fit to be a mom and who is not? Who has enough money and who doesn't? how many kids should someone have? It sounds like a dangerous and very hypocritical road to travel down. And I think that maybe, just maybe, if we looked at ourselves a little more instead of others, we would find plenty of stuff to be concerned with and we could avoid blasting one another and judging others for their life decisions. Call me crazy.
(really go ahead, I said you could...)
8 comments:
I'm so glad you said this. I agree. I have for a long time... but I don't have the courage to speak up. Ha ha. I'm a wimp. I think that having kids without a spouse is irresponsible. But are her actions any worse than the millions of single Mom's that were irresponsible enough to get pregnant with babies they didn't want and can't or won't care for. Atleast this girl wants them and is doing what she can to care for them. And about the whole "who is paying for it" thing... I just have to say that it is the same media attacking her that also supported and advocated for Obama, who will increase these social programs, and give more of the hand-outs that they are now so appalled about.
I agree mostly with you. I do. But... I'm not happy to be paying MY tax $$ to help support her. But then again, I'm not happy paying to support the rich political leaders either. So my issue isn't really with her, rather than with the way our government is set up and run.
i have not really made up my mind on any opinion on her, but had not heard one like yours yet, how true why is it such a big deal.
I mostly agree, too :) But I really don't know much about her and shouldn't say anything....if she's just some single lady and always has been, I don't think it's right for her to take on children at all (but at least she loves them!) If she had a husband and now those kids are fatherless, how horrible that everyone is attacking her!
So I'm a caveman. I've obviously heard about the octo lady since I have a pulse, but I have never really read up on it. SOOO, since I don't have enough of an opinion to argue with you or to call you crazy, sure. I agree with you.
p.s. Way to go on voicing your opinion. More people should do that. But only if they're smart. Because it really annoys me when dumb people are so extremely opinionated about a topic which they have not even researched. They just feel like they should tell the world how they're feeling because it makes them feel special. Seriously. Luckily you seem to have quite a few functioning lightbulbs on in your head, so you're good.
Ok, I'm done.
i love it. thanks for sharing it. all i can say is i'm glad it's her & not me. :)
xo,
H
WORD!
I'm not getting myself all up in arms over this, but I do think her judgment was pretty poor. Apparently, three of the six children she already had are on disability. One is autistic, one has developmental delays, and one has speech problems that the mother thinks may be related to a mild form of autism.
As a single woman with six children already, three of them being disabled, it seems quite probable that her motivation for having another child (especially knowing that multiples were at least a possibility), was not a particularly healthy one. She appears to have been thinking more of her own "need" for another child than the needs of the children she already had.
JMHO, of course, and I am troubled by the fertility doctor even more because other doctors have pretty much agreed that he should have implanted no more than two embryos. Also, many fertility doctors are unwilling to implant a mother of six at all, due the the risks of multiple birth, early birth, etc.
All in all, a sad story. She does have her free agency, but her use of it has created a difficult situation. There will an emotional price to pay. There will also be a monetary price tag. And taxpayers will indeed be paying for it.
Post a Comment